You know, as wise Peyton Sawyer once said, "people always leave."
Yeah, i miss One Tree Hill, but anyways.
People leave, and they don't come back. Not talking about dying, no, i'm talking about losing that connection and leaving the fuckass you once cared about, behind. I mean, i always thought that the worst you can do to a person is just bail and never tell them why. That hurts like a motherfucker, to not know what you did wrong, but to be left out in the cold to become once again, a stranger to them. And maybe that's not really good, maybe that's actually so mean that i can't even begin to describe. Or don't know how. But, it's just something that happens, you leave behind or you get left behind, either way it happens and it sucks.
But, the thing i was actually thinking about, is how the fuck does that even happen. I mean, human relathionships, whatever they are, they need nurturing and care, compromises, mutual support and understanding. It's all nice and simple when you put it like that, but practice is a bit harder. Respect is the first thing you realise is lost. Because without respect, you're walking on egg shells until compromises become giving in. And next thing that's gone is understanding. Because, most of the time, you've known the person in question for so long, they begin to image yourself, and when you finally snap and realise that they're not something for you to be molded to fit your desired persona and the high standards you put for yourself, well, you realise that, if they're not going to fit, you might as well take them out. And it's simple really, we've all been there. We 've all had those friends that have changed. But most of the time, we fail to realise, it's also us who have changed too. And that's why people always leave, because they refuse to grow and evolve together. Because it's easier when you're solo. I say that people's core never changes, their ideals never change. Who we want to be, the person we wish we would someday become, that never changes. We change our views, our beliefs, with new information we shape and constantly change our minds and interests, but we never really change ourselves. You get it? Well, we learn from the past that we can't change, so that our future is less painted with the same mistakes. We can't change the order of life and death, and we most certainly, can not change other people. And yet we try. Not talking about influencing, i mean, you can influence almost anyone with a good enough argument, but you can't change their core, their feelings, their ideals. So, say we have a guy who had done all the wrong things for all the good reasons, is he evil? The road to hell is paved with good intentions they say, but isn't that a bit of a grey area? Good intentions, with poor guidance will most defiinitely appear as bad. A good friend will forgive, but a best friend will never forget. Best friend will understand, and teach. So that the same mistake never happens again.
But people get fed up, and that's quite normal. People get tired, i mean, no one's put on this world to babysit their friends. Or maybe, that's how friendships actually survive? I mean, it's really weird, but i feel like most of the "grown ups" i know, don't have friends like they did when they were young. They get married, they have their lives and they get tired of taking care of the people they're not really responsible for. And that's just how life is. Doesn't mean it was a wrong choice, to leave behind someone, it just is what it is.
Support, understanding, respect, can go a long way if nurtured. And if left unsupervised, it crumbles and disappears. And the next thing you know, you have a stranger sitting next to you over a coffee talking about the weather. Maybe that's just me (probably not), but realising all of this, makes it a bit much easier to swallow. And to let go i guess.
Yeah, i miss One Tree Hill, but anyways.
People leave, and they don't come back. Not talking about dying, no, i'm talking about losing that connection and leaving the fuckass you once cared about, behind. I mean, i always thought that the worst you can do to a person is just bail and never tell them why. That hurts like a motherfucker, to not know what you did wrong, but to be left out in the cold to become once again, a stranger to them. And maybe that's not really good, maybe that's actually so mean that i can't even begin to describe. Or don't know how. But, it's just something that happens, you leave behind or you get left behind, either way it happens and it sucks.
But, the thing i was actually thinking about, is how the fuck does that even happen. I mean, human relathionships, whatever they are, they need nurturing and care, compromises, mutual support and understanding. It's all nice and simple when you put it like that, but practice is a bit harder. Respect is the first thing you realise is lost. Because without respect, you're walking on egg shells until compromises become giving in. And next thing that's gone is understanding. Because, most of the time, you've known the person in question for so long, they begin to image yourself, and when you finally snap and realise that they're not something for you to be molded to fit your desired persona and the high standards you put for yourself, well, you realise that, if they're not going to fit, you might as well take them out. And it's simple really, we've all been there. We 've all had those friends that have changed. But most of the time, we fail to realise, it's also us who have changed too. And that's why people always leave, because they refuse to grow and evolve together. Because it's easier when you're solo. I say that people's core never changes, their ideals never change. Who we want to be, the person we wish we would someday become, that never changes. We change our views, our beliefs, with new information we shape and constantly change our minds and interests, but we never really change ourselves. You get it? Well, we learn from the past that we can't change, so that our future is less painted with the same mistakes. We can't change the order of life and death, and we most certainly, can not change other people. And yet we try. Not talking about influencing, i mean, you can influence almost anyone with a good enough argument, but you can't change their core, their feelings, their ideals. So, say we have a guy who had done all the wrong things for all the good reasons, is he evil? The road to hell is paved with good intentions they say, but isn't that a bit of a grey area? Good intentions, with poor guidance will most defiinitely appear as bad. A good friend will forgive, but a best friend will never forget. Best friend will understand, and teach. So that the same mistake never happens again.
But people get fed up, and that's quite normal. People get tired, i mean, no one's put on this world to babysit their friends. Or maybe, that's how friendships actually survive? I mean, it's really weird, but i feel like most of the "grown ups" i know, don't have friends like they did when they were young. They get married, they have their lives and they get tired of taking care of the people they're not really responsible for. And that's just how life is. Doesn't mean it was a wrong choice, to leave behind someone, it just is what it is.
Support, understanding, respect, can go a long way if nurtured. And if left unsupervised, it crumbles and disappears. And the next thing you know, you have a stranger sitting next to you over a coffee talking about the weather. Maybe that's just me (probably not), but realising all of this, makes it a bit much easier to swallow. And to let go i guess.
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